13 Great George Carlin Quotes

    
 
     1.The planet is fine. The people are fucked.” ― George Carlin

    2. “Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.” ― George Carlin


    3.  “Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty.
I see a glass that's twice as big as it needs to be.” ― George Carlin


    4.  “Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school.” ― George Carlin



    5.  “Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.” ― George Carlin


    6.  “Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.” ― George Carlin


    7.  “Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.” ― George Carlin


    8. “It's important in life if you don't give a shit. It can help you a lot.” ―George Carlin


    9.  “You show me a lazy prick who's lying in bed all day, watching TV, only occasionally getting up to piss, and I'll show you a guy who's not causing any trouble.”  ― George Carlin,


  10.  “Religion is just mind control. ” ― George Carlin


   11.  “Forget the politicians. The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. You don't. You have no choice. You have owners. They own you. They own everything. They own all the important land, they own and control the corporations that've long since bought and paid for, the senate, the congress, the state houses, the city halls, they got the judges in their back pocket, and they own all the big media companies so they control just about all of the news and the information you get to hear. They got you by the balls. They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying to get what they want. Well, we know what they want. They want more for themselves and less for everybody else. But I'll tell you what they don't want. They don't want a population of citizens capable of critical thinking. They don't want well informed, well educated people capable of critical thinking. They're not interested in that. That doesn't help them.”  ― George Carlin


  12.  Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and he needs money.   ― George Carlin



 13.  When you’re born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you’re born in America, you get a front-row seat. ― George Carlin